What Was Lost: A Christian Journey through Miscarriage »

Elise Erikson Barrett has worked in a variety of ministry settings, including youth work, hospital and college chaplaincy, and church ministry. A native of Indiana, she now makes her home in South Carolina, where she is the mother of two small children.

United Methodist Pastor Elise Erikson Barrett draws on her own painful experiences as well as on interviews with others who have gone through the devastation of miscarriage in an effort to help women grieve and, in time, to think theologically about pregnancy loss.

Barrett also offers some much-needed practical advice about breaking the news to others, coping with insensitive comments, and grieving what is often a private loss, unmarked by the world.

Publishers Weekly

Although one in four pregnancies ends in miscarriage, spiritual resources for those who miscarry are shockingly hard to find. Barrett, a United Methodist pastor who has herself had a miscarriage, has written a useful book to fill the void she, and so many others, discover when miscarriage claims their unborn children and their expectations. Barrett shares not only her own story but also the comments of other mothers-to-be who have experienced grief and loss. The author brings uniquely Christian pastoral and theological perspectives that will help not only mothers but also spouses/partners, clergy, and friends. Christian clergy will find especially useful a chapter of resources, but everyone touched by miscarriage can learn from this reflective book. Mothers can take comfort that they are hardly alone and that God is not cruel; others can learn to replace the well-intentioned but too frequently painful bromides of consolation with more sensitive balm. (Sept.)

Foreword Phyllis Tickle ix

Acknowledgments xi

Introduction xiii

Part 1 The Journey through Miscarriage

1 Remembering Your Pregnancy 3

2 Remembering Your Miscarriage 11

3 The Days After 21

4 The Medical Basics of Miscarriage 33

Part 2 The Journey with God

5 Why Did God Let This Happen? 47

6 What about the Baby? 57

7 Connected to the Life of God 65

8 Relating to God after a Miscarriage 75

Part 3 The Journey Forward

9 Who Else Is Hurting? 89

10 Breaking the News 99

11 When Other People Say Hurtful Things 107

12 Long-Term Effects 115

13 How to Say Good-Bye 129

14 Resources and Getting Help 139

Permissions 161

Notes 163