The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to recognize it and how to respond »

Patricia Evans is the bestselling author of four books, including The Verbally Abusive Relationship, Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out, Controlling People, and The Verbally Abusive Man: Can He Change? A highly acclaimed interpersonal communications specialist, public speaker, and consultant, Evans has appeared on Oprah, CNN, national radio, and in Newsweek and O, The Oprah Magazine. Evans lives in the San Francisco Bay Area and can be reached via her website at www.VerbalAbuse.com.

In this fully expanded and updated third edition of the bestselling classic, you learn why verbal abuse is more widespread than ever, and haw you can deal with it. You'll get more of the answers you need to recognize abouse when it happens, respond to abusers safely and appropriately, and most important, lead a happier, healthier life.

In two all new chapters, evans reveals the Outside Stresses driving the rise in verbal abuse-and show you how you can mitigate the devastating effects on your relationship. She also outlines the Leverls on of Abuse that charactherize this kind of behavior-from subtle, insidious put-downs that can erode your self-estem to full-out tantrums of name calling, screaming, and threatening that can escalate into physical abuse.

Drawubg from hundreads of real situations suffered by real people just like you, evans offers strategies, sample scripts, and actions plans designed to help you deal with abousel--and the abuser.

This timely new edition of The Verbally Abusive Relationship, Expanded Third Edition puts you on lthe road to recognizing and responding to verbal abuse, one crucial step at a time!

Foreword 9

Introduction 15

Part 1

Chapter 1 Evaluating Your Own Experience 21

Chapter 2 Two Kinds of Power: A Broad Perspective 27

Chapter 3 Personal Power: A Look At Reality H 33

Chapter 4 The Abuser and the Abusive Relationship: A Look At Reality 37

Chapter 5 The Consequences of Verbal Abuse 47

Chapter 6 The Partner's Feelings 55

Chapter 7 Obstcles and Indicators 65

Part 2

Chapter 8 Characteristics and categoriesof Verbal Abuse 77

Chapter 9 The Anger Addict the Anger Addict 101

Chapter 10 Conditioning and the partner 107

Chapter 11 The Recognition of verbal abuse and Asking for change 113

Chapter 12 Responding With impact to verbal Abuse 129

Chapter 13 Recovery 149

Chapter 14 Looking back 155

Chapter 15 The underlying Dynamics: The Underlying Dynamics: Some Reasons Why 163

Chapter 16 Stress And Verbal Abuse 173

Chapter 17 Irrational Behavior to the extreme 187

Chapter 18 About therapy--and for therapist 197

Chapter 19 Children and verbal abuse 211

Conclusion

Where do we go from Here? 221

Appendix

Frequently Asked questions 224

Bibliography 229

Survey 233

Index 237