Authors: Chris Thurman
ISBN-13: 9780785263777, ISBN-10: 0785263772
Format: Paperback
Publisher: Nelson, Thomas, Inc.
Date Published: December 2002
Edition: Reprint
This newly repackaged edition examines the lies people tell themselves that damage emotional health, relationships, and spiritual life. Psychologist Dr. Chris Thurman guides the reader through part one that identifies the different areas of self-lies, religious lies, marital lies, distortion lies, and worldly lies. Part Two delves into the issues of what is truth, and Part Three deals with how to live the truth, ultimately revealing the freedom that can only come from one thing-believing and telling themselves the truth. An extremely easy-to-follow guide filled with comprehensive workbook exercises, this edition is a way to help people experience the emotional health, intimate relationships, and spiritual fulfillment they are seeking.
Previous editions: 0-8407-3192-2 and 07852-7343-3
Acknowledgments | v | |
Prologue | vii | |
Part 1 | The Lies We Believe | 1 |
1. | The Truth About the Lies We Believe | 3 |
2. | Self-Lies | 12 |
"I Must Be Perfect." | ||
"I Must Have Everyone's Love and Approval." | ||
"It Is Easier to Avoid Problems Than to Face Them." | ||
"I Can't Be Happy Unless Things Go My Way." | ||
"My Unhappiness Is Somebody Else's Fault." | ||
3. | Worldly Lies | 28 |
"You Can Have It All." | ||
"My Worth Is Determined by My Performance." | ||
"Life Should Be Easy." | ||
"Life Should Be Fair." | ||
"You Shouldn't Have to Wait for What You Want." | ||
"People Are Basically Good." | ||
4. | Marital Lies | 47 |
"All My Marital Problems Are My Spouse's Fault." | ||
"If Our Marriage Takes Hard Work, We Must Not Be Right for Each Other." | ||
"My Spouse Can and Should Meet All of My Emotional Needs." | ||
"My Spouse Owes Me (for All I Do)." | ||
"I Shouldn't Have to Change Who I Am to Make Our Marriage Better." | ||
"My Spouse Should Be Like Me." | ||
5. | Distortion Lies | 61 |
"Magnification: Making a Mountain Out of a Molehill" | ||
"Personalization: Taking Everything Personally" | ||
"Polarization: Making Everything Black or White" | ||
"Selective Abstraction: Missing the Forest for the Trees" | ||
"Overgeneralization: History Always Repeats Itself" | ||
"Emotional Reasoning: Feelings Equal Facts" | ||
6. | Religious Lies | 77 |
"God's Love Must Be Earned." | ||
"God Hates the Sin and the Sinner." | ||
"Because I'm a Christian, God Will Protect Me from Pain and Suffering." | ||
"All My Problems Are Caused by My Sins." | ||
"It Is My Christian Duty to Meet All the Needs of Others." | ||
"A Good Christian Doesn't Feel Angry, Anxious, or Depressed." | ||
"God Can't Use Me Unless I'm Spiritually Strong." | ||
Part 2 | Telling Ourselves the Truth | 101 |
7. | The Truth About the Truth | 103 |
8. | To Err Is Human | 116 |
9. | You Can't Please Everyone | 125 |
10. | There Is No Gain without Pain | 132 |
11. | You Don't "Have to" Do Anything | 141 |
12. | The Virtue Lies in the Struggle, Not the Prize | 149 |
13. | Life Is Difficult | 158 |
14. | You Reap What You Sow | 167 |
15. | You Are Not Entitled to Anything | 176 |
16. | Emotional Pain Is Good | 185 |
17. | You Are Going to Die | 194 |
18. | Is There an Ultimate Source of Truth? | 203 |
19. | The Truth About God and the Truth About You | 211 |
Part 3 | Living the Truth | 229 |
20. | Doing the Truth | 231 |
The Battle for Our Minds The Truth Workout | ||
Week 1 | Identifying the Lies You Tell Yourself | |
Week 2 | Knowing Your A-B-C's | |
Week 3 | Challenging Your Lies with the Truth | |
Week 4 | Dealing with Past Events | |
Week 5 | Overcoming Perfectionism | |
Week 6 | Defeating the Need for Approval | |
Week 7 | Facing Problems | |
Week 8 | Discovering Your Identity and Worth | |
Week 9 | Rejecting Your "Have To's" | |
Week 10 | Facing Your Own Death | |
Week 11 | Being Needy, Meeting Needs | |
Week 12 | Developing the Mind of Christ | |
Epilogue | 281 | |
Appendix A | Secular and Biblical Teachings on the Importance of "Right" Thinking for Emotional and Spiritual Health | 285 |
Appendix B | Secular and Biblical Truths for Defeating the Lies We Believe | 287 |
Appendix C | Biblical Support for the Ten Truths Necessary for Emotional and Spiritual Health | 294 |
Appendix D | Biblical Teachings on Truth | 303 |
Appendix E | Recommended Readings | 307 |
Notes | 308 | |
About the Author | 311 |