The Curse of the Good Girl: Raising Authentic Girls with Courage and Confidence »

Rachel Simmons graduated from Vassar College, where she studied political science and women's studies. A Rhodes Scholar, she began her research for this book while at Oxford. She has worked in politics in Washington, D.C., and New York City and lives in Brooklyn.

Rachel Simmons is a New York Times best-selling author and the founding director of the Girls' Leadership Institute. The Curse of the Good Girl looks into the phenomenon of the glass ceiling placed on girls who attempt to live up to the standard of being "good." Simmons then shows how parents can help build girls' self-esteem and give them the strength to pursue their goals.

Publishers Weekly

In this volume for parents of middle-school daughters, the author of Odd Girl Out observes that girls today still pressure themselves to conform to the old, narrow paradigm of a nice, people-pleasing, rule-following, even-tempered, socially acceptable good girl, shunning the image of a rebellious, proud, socially outré, in-charge, outspoken bad girl. To dispel the curse of the good girl, and despite using those familiar, easily misconstrued labels as a touchstone, Girls Leadership Institute founder Simmons offers instructive tales out of school and workshops, revealing that flawed communication rituals and fear of confrontation contribute equally to a girl's belief that it is more important to be liked than to be an individual. In order to become a successful, well-adjusted "real girl," she needs to know how to say no to peers, ask for what she needs and express what she thinks. In the second half of this book, parents will find concrete strategies and tools-confidence-building exercises that emphasize emotional intelligence, self-evaluations, q&a's, scripts and lots of first-person stories-to help guide a girl's growth into a young woman who can respect and listen to her inner voice, say what she feels and thinks, embrace her limits and present an authentic self to the world. (Aug.)Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Introduction 1

Part I A Map of the Good Girl World

1 The Myth of Girls' Emotional Intelligence 15

2 Is She Mad at me? Good Girl Communication Rituals 35

3 The Good Fight: Girls in Confrontation 53

4 All or Nothing: Girls and Feedback 75

5 Girl Meets World: Breaking the Good Girl Glass Ceiling 91

6 My Daughter, Myself 109

Part II Breaking the Curse

Introduction To Part II: From Good Girls to Real Girls 127

7 I Feel, Therefore I am: Building Emotional Intelligence 131

8 From Assuming To Knowing 161

9 Coming Clean: Telling and Hearing the Truth 169

10 Facing Criticism with Clear Heads 199

11 Check Your Good Girl at the Door 221

12 From Perfect Mothers to Real Mothers 237

The Greater Voice of Myself 249

Appendix 255

Acknowledgments 263

Notes 265

Index 269