Managing Expectations: Working with People Who Want More, Better, Faster, Sooner, Now! » (1st Edition)

People have expectations. Your clients, for example. Sometimes their expectations of you seem unreasonable. But sometimes your expectations of them seem just as unreasonable (in their eyes).

The problem is that these mismatched expectations can lead to misunderstandings, frayed nerves, and ruffled feathers. More seriously, they often lead to flawed systems, failed projects, and a drain on resources.

Yet how often do you openly acknowledge these differences in expectations and take steps to better manage them? And how often are you a victim of your own expectations of yourself?

Expectations are difficult to control and impossible to turn off. Naomi Karten offers concrete ways to manage them, and in the process, to dramatically improve the effectiveness of your services.

Booknews

The author is a speaker and seminar leader with experience in technical and customer support and management, and with a background in psychology. She interweaves anecdotes with spelled-out guidelines on such topics as guarding against conflicting messages, keeping jargon to a minimum, listening persuasively, gathering information, and understanding the customer's context. Annotation c. Book News, Inc., Portland, OR (booknews.com)

The Expectations - Managing Framework ..... 2

Communication ..... 2
Information Gathering ..... 2
Policies and Practices ..... 3

Involving Customers ..... 3
Formulating an Action Plan ..... 4
Getting Started ..... 5
Taking the Challenge ..... 6

Section 1: Communication ..... 9
1. Guard Against Conflicting Messages ..... 11

Communicating Conflict ..... 12
Conflict #1: What You Promise vs. What You Do ..... 12
Conflict #2: What You Say You Won't Do vs. What You Do ..... 14
Conflict #3: What You Imply vs. What You Do ..... 16
Conflict#4: What You Say vs. How You Say It ..... 17
Conflict#5: What You Write vs. What You Mean ..... 19
Conflict #6: What You Say vs. What Else You Communicate ..... 20
Circumventing the Conflict ..... 22
Notes ..... 22

Miscommunicating with Technical Terms ..... 24

Muddling Messages ..... 24
Alienating Listeners ..... 25
Speaking Technobabble ..... 26

Miscommunicating with Familiar Language .....27

Differing Definitions ..... 27
Ambiguous Statements ..... 30
Misguided Labels ..... 32
Code Words ..... 35

Misinterpreting Customers' Language ..... 36
Jargon-Checking Kept in Perspective ..... 37

Communicating Status Information ..... 39

Nathan's Preference ..... 40
Building a Skyscraper ..... 41

Communicating Ideas ..... 42
Accommodating Differences in Preferences ..... 44
Gaining Consensus and Achieving Buy-In ..... 46

A Technique for Building Consensus ..... 47

Learning from Preferences ..... 48
Notes ..... 49

Appearing Not to Listen ..... 51

Dividing Your Attention ..... 51
Closing a Conversation ..... 52
Testing Your Tolerance ..... 52

Demonstrating Listening ..... 53

Eye Contact ..... 53
Responsive Behavior ..... 54
Moderation ..... 55

Listening Actively ..... 56

Listen Before Drawing Conclusions ..... 56
Listen to Customers' Questions ..... 57
Listen for Statements of Expectations ..... 58

Helping Customers to Listen ..... 58
Speaking the Way You Listen ..... 59
Observing Cultural Differences ..... 60
Learning to Listen ..... 61
Notes ..... 61

Section 2: Information Gathering ..... 63
5. Help Customers Describe Their Needs ..... 65

Analysis with Focal Points ..... 66

Saying That's Not It ..... 66
Missing a Focal Point ..... 68

Techniques for Describing Needs ..... 68
Types of Focal Points ..... 70

Prototypes as Focal Points ..... 70
Service Requests as Focal Points ..... 71
Bargaining Chips as Focal Points ..... 72

Pitfalls of Focal Points ..... 72
Thinking with Focal Points ..... 73

Finding More Focal Points ..... 74

Notes ..... 75

Learn from a Model Skeptic ..... 78
Clarify Service Requests ..... 78
Challenge Your Assumptions ..... 79
Allow for Inaccuracy ..... 82
Pose Strategic Questions ..... 84
Learn to Think Like a Skeptic ..... 87
Notes ..... 88

Categorize the Context ..... 89

Consider All Factors ..... 90
Develop Your Own Questions ..... 92
Draw Conclusions from the Responses .... 93

Case Study: Peak Workload ..... 93

Group Brainstorming ..... 96
Unforeseen Interconnections ..... 96

Focus on the Customer ..... 97

Questioning Strategies ..... 98
Talk-Inducing Topics