Lessons for the Living: Stories of Forgiveness, Gratitude, and Courage at the End of Life » (Bargain)

Stan Goldberg, PhD, coaches individual and corporate clients in how to effect change more efficiently. He is also Professor Emeritus in Communicative Disorders at San Francisco State University. He has authored six technical books in that field.

He is an experienced public speaker and has published articles, poems, and plays addressing end-of-life issues. His three-act play, Choices, won first place in the 2007 Festival of New Work at the Oxford International Institute for Documentary and Drama in Conflict Transformation.

He is one of six essayists who were asked by NPR to read their “This I Believe” essay at a public gathering in 2007. He lives with his wife in the San Francisco Bay Area. For more information about him, visit his website at www.stangoldbergwriter.com.

When Stan Goldberg was diagnosed with cancer, he chose to face his fear by helping others who were already in the process of dying: Stan signed up as a hospice volunteer and spent several years at the bedsides of the terminally ill. In this book, Stan shares the remarkable stories of people he met who were facing the end of life. Their stories shine a light on the human capacity for beauty, insight, forgiveness, and gratitude, as we see how people like us deal with anxiety and sadness with bravery and love.

But what's especially remarkable is that the bravery and love aren't as much expressed in grand, dramatic gestures as they are in ordinary acts and small accomplishments: in simple efforts at kindness, in asking for and receiving forgiveness, in the abandonment of anger, and in learning to speak directly from the heart—and to listen in the same way. What Stan ultimately discovers—and shares here—are not lessons in dying, but rather, lessons in learning how to live.

Acknowledgments ix

Introduction 1

1 Forgiveness 15

2 Letting Go 41

3 Unconditional Giving 57

4 Heart Communication 75

5 Faces of Compassion 99

6 The Dilemma of Hope 127

7 Undifferentiated Love 147

8 Forgiving 163

9 Epiphany 177

Epilogue 191

Practical Suggestions 197

Helpful Resources 205

About the Author 209