"Do you believe in ghost or have you ever seen one?"
This is a shining example of one of the many amazingly constructed sentences you will find in this book. (Hint, if you couldn't find anything wrong with it,for one thing he didn't pluralize "ghost")
Okay, first of all this book is absolutely AMAZING! Unfortunately when I say "amazing" I don't mean it in a good way. It was amazing that is was written, published and that somebody thought it was good. I really can't imagine having the audacity to write something like this and then try to convince people that it is a REAL book. But then again the "author" calls himself an "author" and has a Myspace where he posts video promos for his "books". I think that the "author" has a lot of ego and very little talent. (Uh oh I hope his wife doesn't read this otherwise she will call me a "hater". Scary!) The only reason I felt the need to write this review was because at the time when I looked this "book" up it was three stars! That is only because the author's wife got on here and gave it a five star review, and I know for a fact it is a one star or less. Although if you write anything bad about this book she'll leave a comment calling you a "hater". Ummm.. Lady this is America, so far I think everyone still has a right to their opinion. I know that in your diluted "haunted house" make-believe world we might not, but this book (fortunately) is not even slightly real. So as of right now I don't have to worry. Again this is Amazon a place to write "reviews" I know some people don't, and get mad at others who do. But I am writing a review, so get over it.
Okay let me break down the pros and cons of the "book"
Cons
There is very little attention to grammar, punctuation, spelling etc. this makes it very hard to read because you are always getting hung up on all the errors, (and trying to correct them in your head, plus in this day and age there is very little excuse for this, seeing as how we have spell check)
The writing is very flat,
"Steven told the officers that Karen had a fear of spiders. Their dog, King, never barked at the haunted house again. The dog still sleeps by Karen's side of the bed. Nancy Bell a friend of Karen's, came over to tell how sorry she was about what happened to Karen."
See what I mean? Kind of leaves a bad taste in your mouth doesn't it? Oh, and no I didn't splice a bunch of sentences together, this is written exactly how it appears in the "book"!
Like another reviewer mentioned, author's the constant overuse of names places etc. This absolutely drove me nuts. How about this excerpt from chapter 2? "Three months after the painting incident, the owner of the haunted house made another call to a man named Bill Myers. Bill had a small home interior repair business in Jackson, Tennessee. Bill got the same offer that the painters had received, which was three times the normal rate of pay. Bill had two helpers, Neal Plunk from Corinth, Mississippi, and Roger Smith from Savannah Tennessee. Neal and Roger were great carpenters. They did not care what condition a house was in they had to repair. Shortly after Neal and Roger had got to work, Bill told them they had some work to do on an old house off the 45 bypass. Neal asked bill "what's the address to the house?" Neal told Bill that the home owner said that the house had recently been painted. The would know it when they saw it."
Bill, Bill, Bill, Neal Neal Neal, who on earth talks like that? And who cares if one guy lives in Jackson, Tennessee, and one lives in Corinth, Mississippi, and another lives in Savannah, Tennessee? Doesn't it sound like a robot is talking? "My name is Neal Plunk from Corinth, Mississippi", and why would you say in one sentence "Neal and Roger were great carpenters. They did not care what condition a house was in they had to repair." that doesn't explain how/why they were "great carpenters", that doesn't even flow or make sense. But that is how the whole book is, you keep having to re-read sentences because you think you misread something. And who sends someone out to a job without giving them the address? Who for that matter sends workers out to a job he hasn't even seen? How are they going to know what they are going to need, etc? Oh, and as a side note my spell check is going crazy because it thinks that every sentence the "author" wrote is a fragment.
Absolutely nothing is fleshed out. "Charles stopped in front of an old spooky looking house" what made it "spooky looking"? Alas, reader the author doesn't say!
I love it when someone dies. It is like "Johnny died, The End". A good suspense writer should know how to build tension in a scene, and how to flesh it out to make it real.
All the stories felt like they were some cheesy bad rip off of something you have read or seen before. Twilight Zone, anyone?
In reality the whole book is a con.
The pros
It is really short (45 pages)
I was able to get it at a library (I didn't have to buy it!)
Ummmm......... I can't think of anything else
Anyway if you want a more in depth review Truth Crusader is right on the money. I would only recommend this book to you, if you are looking for a good laugh, or if you need an example to show your students on how not to write a book. The Dick and Jane stories you read as a kid, are better written than this!
I'll summarize this in the typical Donald Lemire writing style: Donald J. Lemire is a "writer". Donald J. Lemire is not a good writer. Donald J. Lemire needs to learn how to flesh out his stories characters etc. Donald J. Lemire thought that this book was a good idea. Donald J. Lemire was wrong. Donald J. Lemire has a wife named Lille. Lille thinks that Donald J. Lemire stories have ability. Donald J. Lemire's ability must lie somewhere else. Donald J. Lemire hopefully won't write anymore books. Donald J. Lemire's book is bad. The End.
Loading your book clubs
There was a problem loading your book clubs. Please try again.
Not in a club? Learn more
Join or create book clubs
Choose books together
Track your books
Bring your club to Amazon Book Clubs, start a new book club and invite your friends to join, or find a club that’s right for you for free.
Download the free Kindle app and start reading Kindle books instantly on your smartphone, tablet, or computer - no Kindle device required.
Read instantly on your browser with Kindle for Web.
Using your mobile phone camera - scan the code below and download the Kindle app.
From #1 New York Times bestselling author Colleen Hoover comes a novel that explores life after tragedy and the enduring spirit of love. | Learn more
About the author
Follow authors to get new release updates, plus improved recommendations.
