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Jewish Insights on Death and Mourning » (1ST)

Book cover image of Jewish Insights on Death and Mourning by Jack Riemer

Authors: Jack Riemer (Editor), Sherwin B. Nuland, Sherwin B. Nuland (Editor), Sherwin B. Nuland
ISBN-13: 9780815607335, ISBN-10: 0815607334
Format: Paperback
Publisher: Syracuse University Press
Date Published: April 2002
Edition: 1ST

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Author Biography: Jack Riemer

Jack Riemer is the rabbi of Congregation Beth Tikvah in West Boca Raton, Florida.

Book Synopsis

As Jack Riemer demonstrates in this collection of Jewish resources for mourning and healing, the Jewish tradition has much to offer those who seek its help in time of need. Here are personal as well as practical writings by contemporary authors about the Shivah period, Kaddish, Yizkor, Yahrzeit, and less familiar practices to honor the dead and comfort the living. Some writers describe new rituals that were created to fill special needs. Others raise questions about the tradition: Do Jews believe in an afterlife? How do we mourn the stillborn child? Should we always strive to prolong life? Reflections on these and other issues related to death and dying make this an indispensable resource for coping with some of life's most difficult and sacred moments.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgmentsxi
Forewordxv
Prefacexix
Introduction: Jewish Insights on Death3
Part 1Answers21
1.What I Have Learned from Illness23
To Wake Up in the Hospital Early in the Morning24
Coronary Connections: From a Hospital, Some Secrets of the Heart Revealed24
A Wake-up Call33
In Praise of Denial35
A Small Miracle Happened Here37
Charlie and the Angel of Death40
2.When Death Arrives48
Like Removing a Hair from Milk49
Rabbi Salanter's Last Night49
Prelude50
The Power of Music at the End51
Should We Tell the Patient the Truth?57
Let Them Know What You Want59
The Traditional Vidui61
Kayla's Prayer62
Saying Goodbye68
Letting Go73
A Prayer for Health-Care Providers to Offer When a Patient Dies78
3.Hevra Kadisha: The Holy Society81
A Sacred Duty82
The Burial Society83
How Tradition Brought One Community to Life92
Bubby's Last Gift101
4.The Burial108
What Rabban Gamliel Did108
The Funeral of Franz Josef109
Suggestions to Those Who Plan My Funeral110
A Rabbi's Ethical Will113
No Burden Too Heavy118
Keri'ah: The Tearing of the Garment121
Why Bury?124
How We Bury126
Why No Viewing127
Why in Tachrichim?127
Why Stones Instead of Flowers?128
Ha-Makom Yenahem: The Place Gives Comfort130
5.Shivah141
The First Meal142
The Therapeutic Function of Shivah142
Who's the Host? Who's the Guest?151
The Art of Making a Shivah Call152
The Shivah Minyan157
Covering Mirrors161
Why Psalm 49?161
Knitting Up the Tear163
6.Kaddish168
When Death Comes168
A Commentary on the Kaddish169
Going to Shul172
A Year of Grieving, A Year of Growing174
Saying Kaddish: The Making of a "Regular,"177
7.The Year and After183
The Law Sets the Limits184
The Five Stages of Grief184
Shloshim: The First Thirty Days After Burial186
A Way to Mark Shloshim191
Yizkor: The Unending Conversation194
I Am Older Now: A Yahrzeit Candle Lit at Home198
After the Year, What?200
Diary of a Young Widow: A Work in Progress207
In Many Houses219
Name220
Part 2Questions221
8.Is Euthanasia Permitted?223
Laws Concerning One in a Dying Condition224
Rabbi Yehudah's Handmaiden224
The Maggid Rediscovers Music225
I Want a Choice225
Final Entrance229
Long-Term Dignity233
On Choosing the Hour of Our Death237
Death with Dignity vs. Euthanasia244
Not Through Yet257
9.How Shall We Mourn the Stillborn?260
A Yizkor Prayer for Stillborn and Infant Deaths261
I Lost a Child But Did Not Mourn Her262
Neonatal Death265
Baby Brother's Gone to Heaven268
Three Responses to Miscarriage271
Faith Learns to Fill a Need277
10.How Does One Survive the Loss of Children?280
The Story of Rabbi Meir and Beruriah283
Plutarch to His Wife After the Loss of Their Child284
Not on Merit, But on Mazal284
We Will Get Better, We Must Get Better285
On Being the Kaddish297
Firepower in Mitzvot304
11.Do We Believe in an Afterlife?309
In the World-to-Come311
The Birth311
The Ship313
Is There Life After Death?313
Permission to Believe328
The Here and the Hereafter335
The Fate of the Soul338
Love As Strong As Death348
Where Does It End?352
12.What Do We Need Death For?354
Contributors361
Permissions Acknowledgments369

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